We were tired of feeling sad about Jewel the elephant. Having a good memory was a curse. We stopped thinking about how Jewel once stretched her trunk through our caravan window to comfort us when we had the flu. How her trunk would neaten our hair like a mother.
My sister smoked more than before, blew lassos from her lined, chartreuse lips and all the time she swore. I wore little makeup and nursed from my flask. We were making good money, had become quite the draw, and the boss ordering up attached sequin dresses for our dance numbers, but the sequins scratched our necks and we continued to feel stuck.
It was dusk. Purplish clouds popped like puffy feelings and the moon had a fluish smile. As if on cue the boss brought the human pincushion by to say hello. Shiska Bob had coal-black hair who spoke in a monotone and hummed. He poked a finger into his ribs, said “hello beautiful girls”. My sister’s face was very beautiful. Mine resembled a pumpkin that had been lying too long on one side.
My sister giggled and blew smoke rings and tried out a Mae West gag, is that a sword in your pocket or are you….? which embarrassed me and was inappropriate and she couldn’t remember the punchline. Shishka Bob looked embarrassed but it did the trick. He settled himself in, pulled up a folding chair. I told him not to mind her, that she’s just a silly bauble, something I say that helps present her in a kinder light and to show me as the person I am, the practical one. The human pincushion stayed all evening, planting himself near my sister’s chair as if she’d frozen him with her silver wand. Near midnight, just before I spat on her shoe, my sister began to whisper directly into his ear.
I wished for a strike of lightening that would mercifully split us apart, but pretended not to hear, crocheting a doily, watching the purple sky turn into a bruise. As usual, I found myself imagining the elephant. It was as if she were standing there next to me, balancing things out. I pointed to the perfect face of my sister and she watched me with half-closed eyes. Her tail swayed from side to side and she stretched her trunk out to claim me.
